AFL: Brisbane Lions

AFL (Australia Rules Football Leage) is a far better game than Rugby League/Union where the ref has too much influence and skill/strategy is secondary. Soccer doesn't seem to draw much of a crowd in Australia but appears to have the same referee dependence and low scoring issue of Rugby. Grid-iron/US-football appears to be girlie.

Anyways, my alleged team, the Brisbane Lions, have had their butts kicked out of the finals by St Kilda in an embarrassingly poor show of skill on Brisbane's behalf and an exceedingly great display of skill by St Kilda. Brisbane did not make the top eight, even though they have been in the four previous grand finals and won three of them.

So my new team, St Kilda, seem to have a great chance at the Grand Final. Their first final match was close and very exciting. Unfortunately their stupid home page doesn't let me easily see who they are playing next. I have to go to the official AFL web site. Idiots.

Or am I the idiot for caring. Deep down I realise that sport is a distraction from what really matters in life. A tool used to sell junk to the kids and a hideously grotesque and wastful method of allegedly promoting healthy living and dubious role models. Can we say athlete rape? Swimmers really cheese me off, can't stand their face stuck on everything and all the hype we are forced to accept. Yay, we swim fast, it's really exciting, we jump in the water and splash like hell and touch the wall and then cheer our win. Maybe even cry when we get a prize. Then you get to see our faces on fricken Weeties packets and every second high sugar food advert. Oh, and if we win big and want to rest then we can just break contracts and still expect to get public money from these contracts. Oh yes, those medals cost the public millions. But at least it stops us from watching Johnnie Howard and his crew as they go around and misuse public money in creative and secretive ways.

How hard is it these days to buy cereal without an athlete on it. Around the time of the olympics I have to eat no-brand porridge just so I am not sick to my stomach with the self absorbed athlete smiling out at me from my fibre dense product packaging. I would like to call on the thinking people of Australia to boycott food products with any sports related person stuck on it. A museli bar will not turn you into a world class swimmer, only a certain amount of skill, heaps of dedication, a coach prepared to torture you and a whole boatload of public money will get you there.

Sport can be entertaining and does have some social linking value; a conversation is easier between people who can appreciate the finer points of any particular sport. Maybe little fat punk kids might go outside and emulate sports people and get some exercise ... then later be abusive armpits, get drunk and rape girls.

Anyways, St Kilda better win the Grand Final or they can forget my support. Damn right I'm fickle. Who wants to support losers. Loyalty be damned. I see loyalty as a two way street and the club hasn't done anything for me. Generally all I ask is that they don't lose. And they have been. Badly. Bloody Lions.

UPDATE: Bloody St Kilda.